Bridge Over Troubled Waters

Hi again. I’m sorry for the delay.

We were talking about depression, its many causes and hopefully – its cure.

For some, the way out can be long and hard but the main thing is to keep moving. If you are in the middle of the Pacific with no land in sight you have to tread water. Hence the saying, “sink or swim”.

So, what’s the plan? Where do I start? What can I do right now, this very minute, if I’m feeling depressed?

Well as I mentioned before, I’m no professional but I can speak from experience. If we listen to this expert and that, they all place various reasons and theories on the table but unless you seek guidance from a professional, it’s hard to know which way to turn or who’s advice to follow.

In that case, follow yourself. You know yourself better than anyone else on this planet. You probably know what the problem is or why you are feeling down. Perhaps it’s lack of money, issues with your spouse or friends, the loss of a job or myriad other possible causes.

But right now, this minute, realise that you can and will get past it. It may take a little time but this is the turning point. You may feel like crap and can’t see a good reason to get up in the morning and you may just want to shout, “Stop the world, I wanna get off!”

Here is one thing I want you to remember. You are more valuable to yourself, to the community and to this planet than you could possibly think, right now!

You are hurting and disillusioned and don’t deserve to feel that way. That’s a fact. You may feel that half the life has been drained from you and just can’t seem to find that old spark.

Don’t give in. As the saying goes, “life is too short”.

Here’s the second thing I want you to remember ... gratitude.

I know what you’re thinking, well maybe, as you read this. “How can I be grateful for this crappy life”, or whatever the situation happens to be?

The thing is ... you can. If what all the great teachers, philosophers and mystic gurus are telling us is true, you can. Because they all teach us that we create our own destiny and that somehow by our thoughts and feelings, we draw to us the situations we find ourselves in.

In other words, our thoughts determine our destiny. If this is all true, then we also have the power to re-create our lives in accordance with our true natures and desires.

I believe we can have everything we truly desire so long as it doesn’t harm anyone else in the process.

So, where were we? Gratitude!

The way to climb out of the pit may not be easy but first you have to grab the rope. I’m throwing you one right now. Grab it – it’s free!

So, how do you do it? You take the rope in one hand and then grab it up higher with the other. Then you look for a foot hold to help boost yourself up. Does that sound like a plan?

Ok, let’s go through it again.

Take the rope in one hand.

Know that you are a worthwhile human being who may be suffering right now but have as much right to be here as anyone.

Now take the rope higher up with the other.

Think of one thing, right now that you can be at least a tiny bit grateful for. Even, if it’s your ability to breathe and read this message.

Look for a foothold with which to boost yourself.

What are your dreams? Think of at least one thing you’d love to do or achieve in your life.

Now, brace yourself and pull on the rope whilst pushing up with your legs.

Know that you are going to beat this, not the other way around. From this moment on your life is going to change for the better because it can be better than it is for you right now – I know it!

Now repeat the process and so on.

I am not kidding you; your life can get better. It can be all that you’ve always dreamt it could be. Perhaps something has changed through death or some other form of personal loss but as tragic as that is, life still goes on. The sun will rise tomorrow, albeit a little cloudy.

If you have lost someone dear to you – make them proud. Go on and live a grand life, not just for them but for you too.

Believe in yourself and in your right to be here.

Find at least one thing (but preferably many things) to be thankful for each day. When you are in a state of gratitude, you open yourself up to a higher vibration. You feel instantly better about yourself and circumstances and this in return, places you in a position to receive more of the good things the Universe has in store for you.

So, if you ever feel really down, please follow this advice and/or speak to a professional or someone you can trust. You’re not abnormal, you’re just human and sometimes we need to step up to the plate for each other.

I sincerely hope these words are of some comfort to you. They come from the heart. In the meantime, breathe deeply, give thanks, aim high and watch this space!

“Though no one can go back and make a new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending."
-Carl Bard

I wish I’d said that J

A Bridge Too Far

Hello again...

I did say my topics would be random but would somehow come together to form some sort of solid foundation of life.

Well, I'd like to touch on depression for a moment.

It's become a serious issue (growing more common) and something which affects so many, often in debilitating ways.

Of course anything mentioned here shouldn't be taken as a cure all nor replaces professional help as there are various forms, some of which are chronic and others biological.

I think many of us have experienced some feelings of depression but have you ever felt so utterly alone, so down and out, that life hardly seems worth living.

Don't give up. You are not alone and there is hope.

One of the first things to think about is "how do I actually feel?"

Ask yourself a few questions like - Do I know what is causing this?

Is it a particular thing or event?

Perhaps a series of things, e.g. Lack of money, my partner left me, my parent/sister etc is sick or dying. The list is endless and as I mentioned can be a combination of things.

The point I am trying to make (well several points, actually) is that there is hope. So let's break it down in to bite size pieces.

• One way or another, know that there is a way out for you - to be happy!
• Think about (but don't get bogged down) the feelings you have and try to put your finger on the cause.
• Write down a short list of the issues if you can identify them.
• Remember, in almost all cases, there is a way to solve virtually any problem.
• If you can make a list of worries, separate each one and look at them in turn. Each item may be able to be broken down further in to manageable bites. You may be able to spot steps you could take to remove or at least lighten the burden on yourself.

Many of us get tangled up in a web of despair created by our attitudes and responses when life seems to trip us over and stab us in the back. It's easy to feel as though we've been born under an unlucky star.

Some would say, "Oh build a bridge and get over it!"

Now, a sharp jolt like that can often be just what the doctor ordered but more often than not, it comes from self-absorbed insensitive people, focussed primarily on themselves. They want you to feel good so they don't have to deal with it. Let's face it; a depressed person is no fun to be around.

And it's definitely no fun to be depressed yourself!

One of the best cures for depression is to be grateful. Yes, and it's one of the hardest things to motivate yourself to do. Most people just don't get that when you are feeling truly depressed, there seems no end in sight and no way out. Until you feel it, you just don't understand it.

So, what to do? Firstly, if you think its way too overwhelming to try and help yourself, or that you may harm yourself or others - seek help immediately! Make an appointment with your GP or MD, a counsellor or other professional advisor ... and go to it!

However, for many other cases, perhaps you could try the following exercise.

Our lives are made up of many facets and experiences, some of them good, some perhaps - not so good. When we are depressed, it is harder to appreciate or even see, many of the good things, experiences and aspects that surround us.

It all seems dark and dismal as we spiral into that world of, "Everything's wrong, nothing goes right for me" - world.

The truth is, however, that there are always some good things in your life, if only you would notice them.

I will continue on with this important subject when I return.

So please, watch this space!